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How to Boost Self-Trust for the Ultimate in Self-Care

Mackenzie Freeman

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Trust is a concept that you know well. From the time you were born, you learned to trust in the inevitability that a person would do what is expected and promised. Trust is an essential part of your relationships first with your family (parents, siblings, and even extended family). It evolves to become the basis for learning and growth experiences, romances, and (hopefully) something more self-centered: self-trust.  

What is Self-Trust? 

It’s usually called self-trust or self-esteem. The concept traces back to the works of William James, the father of modern psychology, in 1890. His concept of self-trust or self-esteem involved a combination of achievements and expectations, so you could either achieve great things or just lower your expectations. That earliest concept of self-esteem, self-worth, or self-trust changed through the 1960’s as influential figures like Nathaniel Branden ushered in the self-esteem movement, and John Vasconcellos politicized the concept. Fixing self-esteem was lauded as a “social vaccine,” the magic bullet that would remediate or prevent drug abuse, crime, teen pregnancy, etc. The persuasive efforts of Vasconcellos inspired a task force in California turned into the National Association for Self-Esteem (NASE) in 1995.  

Further studies by Psychology Professor Roy Baumeister in the 1990’s demonstrated that the premise for self-esteem was problematic. It could not cure all societal ills, nor could it be easily boosted by artificial means. In 2006, Professor Jean Twenge further found that the current laser-focus on self-esteem not only fueled depression, but also facilitated narcissism. While the concept of “self-esteem” has gradually taken on a negative or skeptical tinge, self-love and self-trust as a more positive spin-off. If you go back to the innocence of youth, before self-doubt crept in, you get the core of who you are and what you want. It’s a diamond in the raw, unmarred by pretension or the fear of failure. It’s something precious, because in that state it’s really about knowing and loving yourself, which naturally equates to self-trust.  

Why is Self-Trust Important & How Do You Reach It?  

The concept of self-trust is important because it relies upon a firm faith and understanding of your own integrity, or sense of self. As you trust yourself, you find a confidence and clarify that you are making the right choices. Self-trust is not about arrogance or narcissism. With true self-trust, it is something beyond external validation or seeking approval, because you have an internal roadmap that lays out your path and direction. Self-trust is unconditional, beyond fear or risk. Even when it feels out of reach, at the bottom of the well, or just beyond reach—self-trust never goes away. It remains, unbroken. 

The question, then, is how do you reach self-trust, particularly since it’s so important for self-care? You might just find that it’s easier than you think. Here are a few top tips for redirecting your focus and mindset inward on your journey toward self-trust.  

Get to Know Yourself!  

Julia Cameron calls it an “artist’s date.” The idea is that you need to find out what makes you tick, feed your creativity, and explore your bliss. It could be a book store, a library, or a toy store. Your exploration could involve a dinosaur expo, a botanical garden, a robot or tech show, a gemstone exhibit, an art museum, or a nuclear science museum. There are countless variations on destinations that could start to restore your self-trust.  

Look Inward, First Thing 

You probably reach for your phone as a first thought when you wake up. It feels natural, but what would happen to your sense of self and self-trust if you repossessed the first moments of your day. Look out the window to notice that the sun is rising. Open a book of poems or quotes, and take time to let the words sink in. Meditate, practice your breath exercises, take 10 or 15 minutes to do Yoga or Pilates stretches in your comfortable spot. Stand in one spot, allowing the silence of your place to surround you. Embrace the blank slate that is the day ahead, as you restore your self-trust.  

Focus on the Now 

When you focus on past regrets or future worries, you’re focusing on fear, loss, and suffering. Instead of living in a state of fear of failure, self-trust allows us to live in the present moment. It can be scary, with a feeling that it’s an unprotected or vulnerable state. What you’ll find is that living in the now opens up a realm of other possibilities. It’s not for the faint of heart. It can take courage, inner fortitude, and more strength than you ever thought you had.  

It can feel hard. It may seem possible… It also might just change your life.

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Life

35 Life Hacks That Will Revolutionize Your Life

Lea Lomas

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Life is all about learning and as we age, boy, do we learn a lot! In order to make the most out of the wisdom we gain from age, we’ve decided to collect 35 of the most clever life hacks on the internet. You can use these simple life hacks for everything from work and travel to getting chores done faster around the house. 

Once you learn these life hacks, you will never want to go back!

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Life

35 Life Hacks That Will Revolutionize Your Life

Sherry Rucherman

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Life is all about learning and as we age, boy, do we learn a lot! In order to make the most out of the wisdom we gain from age, we’ve decided to collect 35 of the most clever life hacks on the internet. You can use these simple life hacks for everything from work and travel to getting chores done faster around the house. 

Once you learn these life hacks, you will never want to go back!

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Animals

A Koala Mother Babysits Three Joeys

Mackenzie Freeman

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The parents who have several young children at home often talk about the challenges that they face. Caring for even one very young child is certainly difficult. Having three kids like this just multiplies all of the associated obstacles. Strangely enough, many animal parents don’t quite seem to have the exact same issues. Then again, it’s possible that koala parents might have some of the same problems. 

Very young children tend to squirm and kick whenever they’re held. Parents who have twins sometimes have a difficult time holding both of the kids at once for that reason. They might get used to it, but it still might pose a lot of challenges physically. These situations are even tougher on the parents who actually have triplets. There are koala mothers who have to care for three joeys at once. A koala mother at the Billabong Zoo was in that situation recently. 

Human parents have certain inherently advantages. The fact that humans are comparatively tall certainly helps. Human infants and toddlers are very small compared to their parents. Many animal parents are not as fortunate, including the koala mother at Australia’s Billabong Zoo.

While these koala joeys are actually capable of climbing trees on their own, they seem to prefer resting on her back. While they’re still smaller than she is, the size difference is actually relatively modest. The mother koala seems to be only around three times the size of each individual joey. Since there are three of them, she seems to be at least somewhat overwhelmed. 

The koala joeys can’t seem to sit still, and all four of them seem as if they’re struggling to get comfortable and stay that way. They aren’t resting peacefully on the mother’s back. Instead, they’re constantly shifting and stepping on her. As this is happening, she’s still trying to hold onto the tree. They almost look as if they’re scratching her at times, which is enough to make anyone feel sorry for the mother koala.

It’s an entertainingly adorable image, but the mother koala still seems to be struggling to keep up with all of these joeys. She’s being remarkably patient, especially when people consider the situation overall. These koala joeys were not actually hers. She was just looking after them.

This sort of thing might surprise a lot of people, since koalas are not especially social animals. In fact, plenty of relatively unsocial animals will care for babies that aren’t theirs. They’ll still have the caregiver instinct, which can be helpful in a zoo environment. 

Koala joeys are actually very strongly connected to their parents emotionally. They spend months in pouches, and aren’t even remotely independent for a full year. It takes them even more time to become truly independent, and they’re still very attached to their parents from that point onward. This koala is not actually their mother, but they have the same sort of bonding instinct that her actual children would have. She’s acting as their mother, and that appears to be good enough for the joeys. 

Even though they could spend time on the tree alone, many of them are not going to want to do so. Koalas are generally very inactive animals. The mother koala in particular just seems to want to rest, and the joeys are not making that easy. Still, as energetic as they are, the joeys still settle down some of the time. 

It almost looks as if all four of them are going to fall any second. Still, all koalas are adapted to this sort of situation, and they’re astonishingly good at staying on trees. 

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